I have worked in youth ministry and religious education for many years now, both as a youth and as an adult. With every year I grow more and more convinced of this: youth ministry as we know it is unsustainable and dying. In order to clarify what I mean, let me first describe the kind of youth ministry I am talking about.
In the eighties and nineties, a predominantly Protestant phenomenon called “youth ministry” exploded into Catholic circles. Back then, most youth ministry was large-scale. It was based on large youth events that youth ministers would invite youth to come and attend. Usually these revolved around a visiting speaker or personality, often a professional, who would run the day and provide entertainment as well as some content.
I suspect that this sort of youth ministry worked back then because there just was not a whole lot of other things for students to do that would get the approval of their parents. “Youth group” was a perfect social opportunity for students to mingle with each other in a place where they felt safe and included. They would learn some about Jesus and maybe meet a cute girl or boy there in the process.
This is not to say that there was anything wrong with this model. In many cases, myself included, it worked. There were many spirit-filled on-fire adults produced by this kind of youth ministry.
In the last decade or so this sort of model has shrunk, or rather, the focus has shifted. Many parishes have begun their own youth ministry programs on a smaller scale. These programs became predominantly an evangelistic arm of the parish. Large scale gatherings took the back burner. This change, however, did not alter the nature of the events. These were still based on the model of, “Hey kids, we are hosting this thing, come and be a part of it.”
I believe that this sort of model is not longer viable in the current cultural atmosphere of adolescent America. I hold this view for a number of reasons.
First, students today are over-involved to an extent that would have been unimaginable for previous generations. Youth group of the past was one of a few options of out-of-the-house organized activity on a weekend. Today, it is competing with countless other sporting events, clubs, organizations, and extracurricular activities. When asked why they don’t participate in their youth groups, many students will say, “I am just too busy!”
Second, typical modern parenting is often at odds with youth involvement in their parishes. I have talked to many students who would go to mass, for example, if only their parents would actually take them. Of course there are other options available, but the fact that so many parents are unwilling to foster the spiritual lives of their children is alarming. Parents are also often antagonistic to the sort of lifestyle that youth groups encourage. These parents reject the teachings of the Church on controversial topics and therefore reject their children’s appreciation for those teachings.
In addition, the behaviors of their parents often cause teens to reject the teachings of the Church, and with it, their activity in the Church. Their reasoning is often something like, “The Church tells me that this behavior is sinful. My parents do this. My parents love me. The Church must hate my parents.” In a choice between rejecting the Church or rejecting the behavior of the parents, teens will very often choose the former.
Third, this model of, “come to us!” is actually the opposite of the pedagogy of Jesus Christ. Jesus did not hold events that he invited people to come and attend. People certainly did flock to him, but only because they heard through word of mouth that this man was worth listening to. He did not go out of his way to stage ‘programs’ or host entertaining shows.
Rather, he sent out disciples. He formed a small group of men who were his closest followers and trained those men to go out and form other groups who would have their own leaders who would go out…and so on. This was the model of discipleship. When people came to Jesus, it was by their own seeking for who he was, not because they heard that there would be free pizza available. The real ministry happened when Jesus said something like, “Hey you, you know what? I am coming to your house tonight for dinner!” or “Hey you fishermen that are out here doing your job at your workplace, come follow me!”
If the old model of youth ministry is dying, the question becomes: is there something to replace it? I would suggest that, for the reasons mentioned above, ministry to youth has to make a very dramatic change. In fact, this ministry to groups of teens should be abandoned for family catechesis.
If ministry to youth is going to work in today’s culture, it must be inseparable from direct ministry to their uncatechized parents. Youth ministry cannot work if it is in opposition to parents. It must, therefore, include parents. This is what I mean by family catechesis. Family catechesis ministers to and teaches the parents as well as their children so that the family can indeed be the authenticDomesticChurch.
What would this family catechesis look like? That gets a bit more tricky. One thing can be certain; we cannot continue to use the Catechesis, Recreation, And Pizza (C.R.A.P.) model. We cannot continue to expect them to come to us. Any form of family catechesis must have a discipleship model. It must go out to them.
Practically speaking what I am suggesting is just the sort of discipleship model that Jesus used. I would have a number of solid, well-catechized, mass-attending families who would be willing to be Apostles. These families would then be sent out to take on other ‘disciple families’ as their own. They wouldn’t hold events or create catechetical programs. Rather, they would invite a disciple family for dinner, or go over to the disciple family’s house for a drink and a playdate for the kids.
The adults would chat with the adults and get to know them and build relationships. The children would do the same. No formal catechesis would take place that didn’t come organically out of their experience of just being together. The real formation would happen by example. The disciple family would experience, perhaps for the first time, what a family looks like when it prays together before a meal or before bed. The disciple family would see how the Apostle parents relate to their children. They would witness the way that their Catholicity permeated their lives. They would attend mass together and observe the way the Apostle family participates, gives their attention, and how they receive the Eucharist in reverence. After a while, they might have a discussion together about some Church document or Catholic book that they have read. This catechesis would be built on relationship and communion and meeting people where they are.
Only by enabling the parents to be the primary religious educators of their children can we expect youth to be catechized. We must answer the call of John Paul II who said, “Family, become what you are.” We must allow the family to be the true Domestic Church. Youth ministry, in the end, must be primarily done by parents.
